10 Things To Know Before You Date An ENFP
ENFPs are one of the most unique personality types. Spontaneous and freewheeling, this type loves nothing more than new experiences with interesting people. Perceptions are important to this type, who loves nothing more than putting on a show and making sure everyone is having a good time. This life-of-the-party type will captivate your imagination and attention — here are a few tips for capturing (and keeping!) their heart as well.
Managing expectations is important.
Being with an ENFP can feel like a dream — all grand, romantic gestures and big plans for the future. This is all great, but communication both ways about what’s sustainable can be important. Letting them know your limits will spare them disappointment or disillusionment in the long term and allow them to start falling for the real you.
Start thinking beyond the honeymoon phase.
Nobody knows how to do a honeymoon phase like an ENFP. Their naturally fun and passionate demeanors lead to some very high highs, unforgettable moments and rosy outlooks for things to come. The last thing anyone wants to do when they’re encouraged to be their most spontaneous self is plan for the future, but a little foresight will help make sure the magic continues out of the infatuation stage.
They’ll make it easy to make them happy.
It’s rare to have to wonder about an ENFP’s “likes and dislikes.” They tend to wear their passions and interests on their sleeves, which makes them the perfect person to shop for. Once you know an ENFP well, you’ll start seeing things they would love everywhere you look, which means you’ll never be at a loss for gifts at birthdays and anniversaries.
Follow-up is important.
Because ENFPs are deeply improvisational and flexible, things don’t always stay with them as long as they would for other types. You might have told them you love them last week, but that might as well have been a year in ENFP time. This personality type perceives a lot of shifts, both internally and externally, and because of that, keeping a line of communication open where they know where they stand with you is especially important.
Be honest (but not in a boring way).
ENFPs don’t like to live in a world with limits that make them feel like options or outcomes aren’t available to them; their favorite headspace is a cosmic sandbox where anything and everything is possible. It can be fun to live in this space and dream with them, but this can also make it tempting to conceal your real needs and limits in order to not rain on their parade. Make sure you are being honest about what you can’t do, while also highlighting the things you can. Maybe you can’t afford a trip to Paris right now, but you can put time and energy into a day trip they’ll appreciate just as much.
Support can go a long way.
ENFPs are full of incredible ideas and schemes but can lack follow through. With a partner who’s able to encourage them to stick to their dreams they can go further than they’d ever have imagined possible, and bring you along for the ride.
They’ll make you think bigger, too.
ENFPs are dreamers, but one of their strengths is that they dream for others too. You’ll never find someone more supportive of a goal, even if it seems far away or out of reach, and nobody will ever think as highly of you or believe you capable of bigger things than an ENFP partner. ENFPs are great at talking down the critical voice inside your head and love to watch you soar.
Learn the art of the grand (and small) romantic gesture.
Just like everyone else, ENFPs appreciate any gift, gesture or kind word that makes them feel cared for, even if it’s something small. That being said, nobody appreciates real-life romcom moments more than an ENFP, and something that goes the extra mile every once in a while will never fail to make an impression.
Create a safe space for their “backstage” self.
ENFPs find it extremely difficult to be anything less than their most entertaining self in front of others. It can be easy for them to believe that their stage presence is what their loved ones expect of them and they can feel a lot of pressure to never ruin the fun. Letting them know it’s OK to have a bad or low-energy day around you will make them feel more secure and comfortable.
Conflict resolution is crucial.
ENFPs, more than many other types, desire to always live in a positive, happy space without issues. This makes them more sensitive to conflict than most; a disagreement that might be forgotten in an hour by another type might throw them off kilter for a while and might leave them worried about the state of your relationship. Conflict is inevitable in any relationship and avoiding it altogether isn’t healthy, so making sure an ENFP feels reassured that they are still loved and cared for after conflict will help build their confidence with you and keep them from spiraling.
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